Thursday, April 30, 2009


Quite simply, we all want to be loved for who we are. But each and every one of us is so afraid of being rejected for our true self that we create a "pseudo-self", a surrogate peronality that we send out ahead of the real us to test the waters. We make this ersatz person similar enough to ourselves to gather data about how safe is the social climate, but dissimilar enough that if it is rejected we don't feel as if we have been rejected. Just like the Mars Pathfinder mission, the rover goes where humans are yet unable to tread. The problem is that while this works fine for everyday use such as in the business place or with casual friends, True Love can only occur when the unspoken essential qualities of one person line up the those same qualities in another. Alas, those are the exact same qualities we consider the essence of our "selves", so they are the very ones we hide to avoid rejection of the real "us". We can be happy in life without exposing our hearts to risk. But if we really want deep, fulfilling, satisfying emotional love, we will never achieve it until we have the courage to walk the face of that planet with our own feet, not with our robot servant.

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