What might have been...
A note I just sent to my daughter:
Today is Grandma Trudie's birthday. She would have been 82. Last January 30 was the 20th anniversay of her death (and also Papa's birthday - he would have been 103).
My mom used to tell me when it was somebody's birthday who had died, and tell me what age they would have been. I always wondered why she did that - what's the point, they're dead.
But now I know. You think about all the wonderful times you had with them when they were alive. You miss them, and you think about all the things in your life that happened since they died that you might have shared with them. You picture their reactions to things you might have told them, accomplishments you've achieved, and wonder what they might have done or thought of and shared with you. Not to mention visits, places you might have gone together, movies you've see they would have liked.
Sharing with them was so important when they were alive that you mark each anniversary of their death and take a bit of time to think about the times you might have had, and how your life might be different now if they were still around.
So, that's why she told me how old someone would have been.
And that's why I'm telling you.
Today is Grandma Trudie's birthday. She would have been 82. Last January 30 was the 20th anniversay of her death (and also Papa's birthday - he would have been 103).
My mom used to tell me when it was somebody's birthday who had died, and tell me what age they would have been. I always wondered why she did that - what's the point, they're dead.
But now I know. You think about all the wonderful times you had with them when they were alive. You miss them, and you think about all the things in your life that happened since they died that you might have shared with them. You picture their reactions to things you might have told them, accomplishments you've achieved, and wonder what they might have done or thought of and shared with you. Not to mention visits, places you might have gone together, movies you've see they would have liked.
Sharing with them was so important when they were alive that you mark each anniversary of their death and take a bit of time to think about the times you might have had, and how your life might be different now if they were still around.
So, that's why she told me how old someone would have been.
And that's why I'm telling you.
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